I just wrote a post, well about half of it, and my goddamn computer froze and I almost went apeshit. I went out to have a cigarette, and my neighbor Doug was out on his balconey too. We're smoking buddies, it seems like no matter what time I go out there, he's having one at the same time too. We started talking about how we had both gone to Mexico in the past 2 years, and it got me in a good mood. Thanks for brightening my mood Dougie E. Doug!
As I was walking to class today, I noticed for the first time all the leaves on the ground. Fall is officially here, bitches. It made me remember walking home from grammar school everyday and stepping on the dry crunchy leaves. Nothing makes me remember my childhood more than crunching leaves or watching fireworks. I really did have a great childhood. My parents did everything for me, Keri and J.P. to make sure we had a good upbringing. My mom got a job cleaning houses when my brother was about 2 and she still does it now. I used to be embarassed about this, because other mom's had "real" jobs, but then I realized how hard she works and how stupid I was for being ashamed of what she did. My dad is a firefighter (a Battalion Chief at that) for Chicago, and I am really proud of what he does. Whenever I tell someone what he does, they just kind of look at me wide-eyed and go "Really?" I'm not going to lie, I love getting that reaction because he loves his job (he won't even call it a job) which makes me happy that he does something he loves. I hope I get a job someday that I won't consider a job either. They took us on a few trips every year, mainly to Arizona to visit Mom's family or Michigan and Wisconson, plus the annual ski trip, because it seemed that everyone but us had a cottage there. I've been to Mexico though, and Colorado to ski twice and a shitload of other places. Most of the time it was a road trip in our huge ass van that seats 12, even though we're a family of five. It was because of those trips that I can now fall asleep in any car ride, in any position too.
I don't want this post to sound like I'm bragging, because I'm not, my family isn't perfect and of course we all don't always get along, who's family actually does? My siblings and I are far from spoiled too. We had a nice house, a good education, went on trips and even have a spa in our backyard now too, but money was never just handed to me. I was always baffled when my friends would be like "My mom handed me a $20 tonight because she knew I was going to the mall." Handed you a $20? Holy shit, I can't borrow $2 from my mom without having to pay her back. For anything I wanted, I had to use my own money for it. I went on a cruise my senior year spring break, and the other 3 girls that I went with had their trips paid for by mommy and daddy. My mom lent me the money, but I was paying that trip off for months. Being in college right now, I feel like a spolied brat when I say my mom pays my bills and rent and part of my tuition (I have a loan that I'll be paying off until I'm 80 for the rest of it), but I really am so thankful for that. I can't even imagine having a job out here that would have to pay enough for my rent and bills every month. I'm looking for a job now, and I know anything I find won't pay me enough to cover all that. But once I'm broke, I'm broke. I know better than to plead for money now, becuase my mom just laughs at me and says "Yeah right Kate." I get insanely jealous when Emily gets a card from her mom saying "Here's $100 becuase I know you're broke." I would have a heart attack if my mom gave me $5. You would think that having to earn my own money would have taught me "the value of a dollar." Haha, far from it. I get $20 and the next day I have 3 cents left with nothing to show. I am awful with money management. I really need to open a savings account once I get a job.
My mom and I have always had a very difficult, I guess you could say, relationship. I was grounded at least one day a week in high school every week becuase I can't keep my mouth shut and always have to get in the last word. Going away to college was one of the best things that could have happened for us. Now I actually look forward to seeing and talking to her. It's funny to realize that when for 18 years I couldn't wait to get away from her. When she picked me up 2 Wednesdays ago for the Rufio concert, she started yelling at me because the rent was due in 2 days and I still hadn't turned it in. Normally that would have pissed me off and I would have been angry at her for the rest of the day, because I don't like to let go of my anger easily, but I remember thinking "For fucks sake, just let it go, you're only going to be seeing her for a few hours." And I did! That probably doesn't sound like a big deal, but it was to me. I think I'm getting more mature in my twenties! (Shut up all of you, I know I don't act like it, but just go with it.)
I don't know why I went off on a family tangent tonight. They're a great bunch, especially the siblings Anne Frank and Jeep. Poor J.P, he's stuck in that house all alone with those crazy bastards. If I had had to live there alone with them, I would have shot myself already. You'll like them a lot better when you move out, I swear. He doesn't even read this. I don't know why I like to talk to people on here who don't even read this. I love you bitches!