Wednesday, March 02, 2005

This Is Called "I Don't Want To Do My Fucking Homework"

1. I cannot wink.
2. When I sing, I sing out of the side of my mouth, which greatly amuses Emily, Keri and KJ.
3. I am currently on a rampage of downloading Disney songs.
4. My favorite Disney movie is Dumbo.
5. I am getting my haircut this week, preferabley tomorrow.
6. My wedding song will be If Not For You by Bob Dylan
7. I got a D on my History of India test. Fuck you India.
8. But I did get a B on my Anthropology test.
9. Emily and I got an Oreo McFlurry today, and since there wasn't enough Oreos in there to satisfy us, we added 4 more when we got home.
10. That is one of the reasons why I will most likely be obese in 5-10 years.
11. I want to have 6 kids.
12. My favorite number is 12.
13. My first concert I ever saw was Rick Astley. My second was Vince Gill.
14. I have been best friends with Megan since 4th grade.
15. I'm 50% Irish and the other 50% is German, English, Scottish, Welsh and Dutch. My mom is a mutt.
16. I have an aunt and two cousins who are practicing Quakers.
17. The first pack of cigarettes I ever bought were Newports.
18. One time I took a sip out of a Pepsi can that was full of cigarette butts.
19. I have read all of the Babysitter's Club books at least 3 times.
20. I've lived in Chicago my whole life but have never been to the top of the Sears Tower.
21. I do not posess any credit cards.
22. Keri insists that one time when we were little, I held her down and spit in her ear. I refuse to remember that incident.
23. I never skipped a class in high school. I made up for it in college though.
24. I am finding out that I am more and more like my mother each day. This is a fact that horrifies me.
25. The day I graduated from 8th grade, I got in a huge fight with my mom, and I slammed my bedroom door really hard. My dad proceeded to take the door off its hinges, and in every picture from that day I have puffy eyes from crying so much.
26. I have a hard time pronouncing a lot of words. But don't fucking correct me. I hate that.
27. When I was growing up, I refused to wear any other color but purple.
28. If I could only take 3 things with me on a deserted island it would be an endless supply of Bonne Bell lipgloss, Oil of Olay mosturizer and Bob Dylan cds.
29. I went to an all girls catholic high school, but haven't gone to church or practiced lesbianism since graduation.
30. After 6 years of searching, I finally found the perfect mascara: Maybelline XXL Volume + Length. It was better than finding my soul mate.
31. I brush my teeth at least 5 times a day.
32. My ideal outfit: sweatpants and a hoodie. God I'm sexy.
33. If I could go back in time, I would go to the 1920's to be a flapper. Or the 1980's so I could get some more use out of my neon yellow spandex shorts.
34. My favorite word to say is "Goddamnit." Not "godammit" or "god damnit." It's GODDAMNIT.
35. I want to be the Olsen twins.
36. I love swiss cheese.
37. The song Old Time Rock 'N Roll by Bob Seger will NOT be played at my wedding.
38. I have an obsession with Maury Povich.
39. If I could live anywhere, it would be in Telluride or Colorado Springs, Colorado.
40. Bitches.

16 comments:

Jenn said...

1. I don't understand how you can't wink. Just wink, damnit!
2. I so wanna see that!
3. You would be. Only you.
4. Mine is Emperor's New Groove. Is that fuckin' Disney?
5. Don't cut it, you dyke.
7. Fuck you India! (That busted me up, by the way.)
8. Anthropology? Is that dyke stuff?
9. Don't drag your sister into your madness.
11. I want one, MAYBE 2 more.
12. Why 12?
13. My first concert was New Kids On The Block. My mom showed me the tickets two days ago. She saved them.
14. I have been best friends with Valerie since 2nd grade. That makes for 19 fucking years.
15. I'm Hispanic. We're spanish mutts.
16. What the fuck are Quakers?
18. What a dumbass.
25. I like that episode on Roseanne.
26. blaaag!
27. That's 'cause you're a dyke.
29. So that's part of why you're a dyke?
30. We had this conversation.
32. You really are sexy.
34. Quit saying that, damnit!
35. You can be a anorexic without being them.
38. It's the same show with different people EVERY time. Dyke.
40. Biaatch!

Jenn said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ariel said...

That's quite a lot of information about yourself miss Katie, it was a fabulous read though. My friend is always singing songs from The Little Mermaid, not because my name is ariel or whatever just because she's like that. My first concert was KISS haha, I had never even listened to them, but I went anyway! If my house was burning and I had to run out quickly and could only grab a few things I would grab this quilt that my gramma made me, pictures, Jason memorabilia, and my record collection. My quilt is old and raggidy (however you spell that) but I love it anyway. You didn't mention anything about if your house was burning but I used that instead of the "if I was on a deserted island" thing. If I could go back in time I would want to go to the 1960's or 1970's.

Ariel said...

AND, I forgot, the most important thing...It's DAMMIT or God dammit!!! There is no N! Jenn, I think quakers are kind of like amish people.

Jay said...

icky memorabilia?!?! is that like a bunch of bjork cds and his strawberry basket from when he picked stawberrys?


anyways, knowing the katie was a catholic schoolgirl only provides this valuable information

1: shes not that innocent

2: shes going to do anal sometime in her life

3: she'll eat at a pink taco stand sometime in her life

4: shes going to have at least one sex tape made

5: shes gonna smoke all her life

6: she needs to get me some naked pictures of emily.

Cowe said...

Goddamnit is the cool way to say it, that's why I'm letting Katie be my new best friend.

Bill B. said...

Only Katie would take CD's and not a CD player to a deserted island...and even if you did have a player, you'd have to have an endless supply of batteries.....so you'd just be staring at a bunch of Dylan CDs like boy oh boy I wouldn't mind listening to these.
You so crazy whitey!

DyingBurningFighting said...

1. Just close one eye... no just one! Keep the other one open. No! Wrong again, you're hopeless.
2. Hmmm... what else dod you do out the side of your mouth?
3. Check this out: http://www.lovedungeon.net/humor/misc/aladdin.html
4. Fantasia
5. I got my haircut yesterday. Hah! Beat ya.
6. If I were a boxer/wrestler, my song intro would be "Why Can't We Be Friends" by whoeverthefuckwroteit
7. Why? Why take a History of India class?
8. Only cause you like monkeys and sex.
9. Yeah, McFlurry's are cheap pieces of shit.
10. One? What are the others?
11. I'm assuming this is one of the other reasons.
12. My favorite number is 13. I'm always on top.
13. See.
14. The only friends I have are the ones I made last month. Next month I'll have new ones.
15. I am the product of an European orgy, during which some Mexican dude stopped by to deliver a pizza and got dragged in as well.
16. I eat Quaker Oats when I'm low on food money.
17. I don't smoke, but I carry a lighter cause almost everyone I know does.
18. UGGGHH!! Poor you :(
19. Ummm... why?
20. You complete lame.
21. Me neither, I have no credit history so no one will extend me credit so I can't establish a credit history.
22. Admit it, you're evil. This denial will eat away at your very soul. Soon you will develop an ear fetish (tragis anyone?). You'll become desperate to have yours ears touched. You'll become a tragi whore.
23. I skipped half of high school, and still passed all my classes.
24. I found out that I share several traits with my father. This is strange as I only met him once when I was five.
25. Ummm... I ran away at the age of six.
26. It's pronounced co-rect not ca-rect.
27. I wore nothing but black.
28. An incredibly hot chick, a bed, and a boat (so I could leave when I felt like it). Hey how would you listen to those cd's?
29. Do you still have your uniform? You have to wear it when we make babies.
30. okay... whatever.
31. Can you say OCD?
32. Easy access!! I don't need to unzip sweatpants.
33. I would go back 15 years, kill myself and take my place. Course, I'd have to become fifteen years younger too.
34. ARRRR!!!!
35. What a coincidence! I want to fuck the Olsen twins.
36. I like Cheddar, extra sharp.
37. Good shit! Fuck that song.
38. Who? Oh my God! You are so fucking lame!
39. I would live in a mansion so big you'd get lost for a week trying to find the bathroom.
40. Where!?

DyingBurningFighting said...

Top THAT Jenn!!!

Peppermint Patty said...

why the hell did you quit practicing lesbianism?

Jenn said...

Damnit Keegan, your's was better. And I laughed, alot. Bastard.

theron said...

I have absolutely no idea who Rick Astley, Vince Gill or Maurice Povich are but am filled with an instinctually derived conviction that at the end of a google search, my preferred fix for my boundless ignorance, i will still be just as confused as to why these people exist or what, exactly, inpires your interest in them.

My first concert was, for no good reason at all, jethro tull. While I don't harbor any personal emnity toward said band, neither do I have any vested interest in their music. After that first time, I made it my business to, exclusively, attend shows of bands I actually liked.

In 7th grade, when everybody convinced their parents to let them attend the Vanilla Ice concert, I quietly demurred, preferring in its stead to stay nestled with the latest dragonlance novel, featuring the hilarious misadventures of kender and such, in the relative security of my room.

Cowe said...

I'd be stuck on the desert island too, and I'd bring my babies, my CD collection, and a manual on how to build electical appliances from plants.

Jenn said...

Damn, Katie! Rollin' in the comments. You the ill nana!

theron said...

what, are you busy with school or something? where's the new shit, yo?

Jill said...

Gagging from just thinking about drinking those cig. butts. Yes, I've had that misfortune before. Yuck.