1. My birthday was motherfucking awesome. It was a three day binge of nothing but drinking AND I LOVED EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF IT. I should have got my pictures put on a disc because in everything one I was a) wearing a crown b) throwing the "westside" sign c) closing my eyes. I don't remember most of Wednesday night, so I would say the mission was definitley accomplished.
2. I spend way too much money at the bar. I'M NOT BITCHING ABOUT IT THOUGH. Tuesday night here is the "new Saturday" because a band plays every Tuesday at this bar. I think I might accomplish my goal of becoming a regular at a bar. Is it Tuesday yet?
3. We got some some lame ass drama going on in life right now that involves friends and boys. I'M SORRY THAT I LIKE IT WHEN A BOY PUTS HIS ARM AROUND ME, DO YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME A GODDAMN ULTIMATIUM (thanks Jenn) ABOUT IT? I'm basically going through the girl version of "bros before hos" and I don't like it. Not one bit. I have a crush on the ONE guy that I should have stayed away from. You sure know how to pick 'em Kate.
4. I didn't realize that my brother was an alchoholic until I turned 21. He's lucky I just turned 21 and still enjoy buying 18 year olds beer, because in a few months I am absolutley NOT going to leave the bar to buy them beer anymore. I probably still will because I'm a pushover so score for my brother that his sister is a pussy who can't say no.
5. When someone gives me a $2 tip at work, the first thought that enters my mind is "THIS WILL BUY ME A 40 TONIGHT." I'm a classy broad, yo.
6. I got my grades back and I got one D, one A, one B and two C's. I KNEW I hated Russia the most out of all the countries in the world. That D just confirmed it. Why am I even bitching, I deserved that D and I still got credit for the class. Fuck yeah bitch. I start my math class June 13th and I'm really pumped about it. No, really I am. I love classes called "Quantitative Literacy" because I TOTALLY understand what that means.
7. I might be going to one of my co-workers weddings with my bosses son as my date which is awesome because I've had a crush on him forever. I'm not really sure if it was just drunk talk, but HE asked ME so I'm hoping it does happen. I have his number though, and he doesn't have mine, so that blows because you have no idea how much balls it is going to take for me to call him. We're talking major, bigass balls here. I'm not sure if that'll happen. Everybody please send me stop-being-a-pussy-and-grow-some-balls vibes my way. It would be greatly appreciated.
8. My mom bought "Superhero Popsicles" and you have no idea how much joy those things have brought into our house these past few days. It's pathetic and glorious at the same time.
9. My friend's dad is going to Kentucky for a few days and is picking me up a carton of P-Funks for $25. How fucking sweetass is that? I'm paying $5.05 right now and I feel like I've been raped each time I buy a pack (appropriate analogy). Why don't I just quit? Because I'm a douche bag. I thought that was obvious.
10. This list took me way too long to write. I think I got rusty by not updating for a few weeks. That's why I shared such useless information. At least I didn't tell the story about how I was babysitting and my uncle's dog threw up AND THEN ATE HIS OWN VOMIT. I told my cousin Andrew "Good lord, I can't eat anything now after seeing that" and he replied "just think about pizza!" You give great advice Andrew and I thank you for that. Sorry, you heard the story anyways. If you have that awful mental image in your head, just listen to Andrew and think about pizza, bitches.