Monday, November 14, 2005

The One Where I Can't Stop Typing

WHY DID I HAVE TO WORK TODAY.

I missed the awesomest fucking Bears game. Chicago lived up to its nickname today with the wind blowing around 50 mph causing field goals to be blown 20 yards off course, Orton throwing 4 interceptions (at least I can pretend the wind was the problem there) and a 108 yard touchdown as a result of another missed FG. 108 FUCKING YARDS. I've seen the replay 86 times and it just keeps getting better. Those blocks! Those moves! That defense! That wind! Nathan Vasher is now in the history books, bitches. He was also the"Sounds of the Game" guy and it was kickass to hear all the grunts and hits as he ran down the field. HMT, you're only one who gives a shit so lets cyber high 5 or something. Five goddamn wins in a row. See you in Detroit come January.

Next week is the real test when we play the Panthers at home. They're actually a good team, so we'll really prove ourselves after we beat them. I can't wait to watch that game. Oh wait, I won't be able to. I have to go to Ireland instead. Oh the humanity.

I am really freaked out about the plane ride. If you've ever been on a longass flight, please leave me some advice on what will best knock me out the entire time. Xanax? Lots of whiskey? Qualuudes? A swift kick to the face? Reading my Global Politcal Economy textbook? I want to fall asleep in Chicago, while still on the runway at O'Hare, and wake up in Dublin screaming "WE DIDN'T DIE", no matter how great the in-flight movie promises to be. Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated. Plus I will bring you back a rock. From Ireland! Your very own Irish rock! Hurrah!

I have to read two 25 page papers by tomorrow and critque them. Awesome.
I have to read 130 pages of a book and write a 5 page paper on it by Tuesday. Also awesome.
I'll be in class/at work from 11 am-9 pm tomorrow. The awesomest.

Harry Potter and Walk the Line come out this Friday. My mom and I are going to see one of them, but I can't decide what I want to see first. Harry Potter so I can rub it in Keri's face? Or Johnny Cash so I can jizz all over myself? You KNOW how much I like jizzing. It's a tossup.

I'm taking two sweetass history classes next semester, the History of Chicago and Modern Ireland. It's almost like they knew it was my last semester. Not as excited about having two classes on Fridays and starting at 11:00 am every day. I haven't had a class on Friday or before 12:30 since freshman year. Again, the humanity. What the fuck.

I went to McDonald's today (I am apparently doing my best to sabotage the 11 lbs I lost) and after I ordered the server goes "Would you like to donate a dollar to save a child?" I didn't want to be accused of murder, so I gave my dollar just so my conscious would be clear. I had no idea my dollars had special healing powers or else I would have donated earlier. It was kind of like the time I went to give blood, but got denied after telling them I had been to the Domincan Republic. I explained, "Well it wasn't REALLY the Domincan Republic, it was a small ass island off the coast that the cruise line owned." She then asked "You don't want to get little baby a sick if your blood is tainted, do you?" Yeah, maybe I do. What now? LAY OFF THE GUILT TRIPS.

The plus side: I did get a free Destiny's Child song to download. All the blood-taker-outer-people gave me was a "I tried to give blood today" sticker. Cheap bastards.

6 comments:

Rat In A Cage said...

I think I want to see Johnny Cash with you & watch this phenomenon.

Whatever you do, don't wake up half way over the Atlantic & yell anything about dying. It could be problematic.

prufrock said...

Jizzing is the best. Totally.
That is hillariuos. I tried to give blood today. I think I just laughed some jizz out of my nose.

HMT said...

Orton didn't throw 4 interceptions... I don't think he threw 4 passes. Come to think of it, I don't think both teams combined threw 4 passes all game. It was football at it's best.

It's that bastard returning our punts who was giving us ulcers Katie. THREE FUMBLED KICK RETURNS! COME ON WADE!

but again, we won. Next week - you're right - will be a true challenge against those bastard panthers. I wish we could watch it in a cyber bar or something. No I don't, that's gay.

Bill B. said...

Best long distance flight advice I can offer Katie:
Take plenty of books, every cd you own, batteries to last about 15 hours, a fully charged cell phone, plenty of cool magazines like Blender, Stuff and Maxim that are fun to read, take a video game if you have one, like a gameboy or something, and odds are they are going to show some crappy movie like House of Wax with Paris Hilton or something.
If you want to freak people out buy a portable dvd player and take the movie Alive with you and play it loud.
Now bring my Irish rock back yo. I want it to have stoned a Protestant too!

Rat In A Cage said...

Impressive revolving banner.

Thoughgt about you at lunch today as I read my "Irish Echo"

Ariel said...

Thank you muchly lover, I really enjoyed having to read through all that sports nonsense to get to the good part of the blog.

I want to go to Ireland! Or anywhere. My best advice, speaking as a world traveler myself, ok just to Canada but give me a break...anyway, stay up the entire day/night before you go and then maybe you'll be so exhausted you'll sleep on the plane. That's happened to me a few times before, it's the only time I can sleep on a plane actually.

My friend Angie was having the same dilemma, whether to see Harry Potter or Walk the Line. I think she decided on Walk the Line. I'm so excited for that movie.

Have fun on your trip, I don't know when you're going, but I'm sure it will be a hoot and a half.