Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Jesus Christ, We're Too Late

I've been slacking for the past week, but I finally feel like blogging again, so here's another boring post for you to read. And I don't blame you if you don't leave comments; I don't derserve them because I haven't left any lately, but I swear I will tonight. Promise, bitches.

This past weekend was fun at times and other times it was frostbitten. On Friday, Emily, me and some friends went to this bar/restaurant at 9:30 because they don't start carding until 10:00, plus a friend knows one of the bouncers, so I could get in. It was $1 you-call-its, and thank god it was or else I would have whipped out my debit card and racked up a tab of $86 dollars. I don't know how I'm going to afford it when I finally do turn 21. I should add at this point that on Friday it snowed a shitload and by Saturday afternoon we had gotten about 8-9 inches. This didn't stop me from wearing my heels though, because I'm a dumbass. (Some of you heard this story already, so just skip over it). So we leave the bar, go to a party, it was lame, so they want to go back to the bar. There were charging a $5 cover, and since we had gotten there early we didn't have the required wristband. But luckily my friend talked to her bouncer friend and we all got wristbands for free. Sweetass. The bar closes at 2:00 and we go back to my old friend Dan's house. By then I just wanted to go home and was willingly to walk by myself, but Emily wanted to go too, we just had to walk to her car which was about 2 blocks away. It started out fine, but then we had to cut through this parking lot that hadn't been plowed, so I'm trying to walk through 8 inches of snow in my heels. I can't walk anymore because my feet are so cold, so I tell Emily I'm going to wait at the corner. To get to the corner though, I still had to walk through about 150 feet of snow. I'm trying to run, and I look down to see I lost a shoe. I couldn't tell the difference if I had shoes on or was barefoot becuase my feet were about thisclose to frostbite. I find my shoe, and run again, only to lose another shoe. I decide "Fuck the shoes, I jsut need to get out of the snow" so I'm running with one shoe, then lose the other one. I get to the corner and am sitting on same random person's porch even though I can hear people inside because I can't feel my feet at all. Emily finally drives up and it horrified to see I don't have shoes on. I honestly thought I was going to get gangrene or something. I finally got in our apartment and am almost in tears because of how much my feet hurt. Feeling finally comes back to them and I am glad to say that I did not have to amputate either one of them. I could care less about the shoes, they were only $20 and I didn't like them much anyways. Maybe when the snow melts I can try to find them. My feet still felt a little fucked up the next two days, but now they feel completely normal. The kicker - on Saturday (when obviously the snow had not melted yet) Emily is getting ready and goes, "Should I wear my heels tonight?" Please tell me you're kidding. Didn't she learn anything from last nights episode? Some people.

Then Saturday sucked ass because both Keri and Kelly, the old roomie, were supposed to come up for the night, but the goddamn weather caused both of them to stay home. I love the snow, but not when it fucks with my plans. My parents are douchebags though. It hadn't even been snowing for about 3 hours and they still wouldn't let Keri come up here. Bastards.

The reason Keri went home on Saturday was because she got my mom and her tickets to see Jesus Christ Superstar, for her birthday. Keri, being the smartypants she is, neglects to actually look at the tickets for the play she had had for over a week, and thinks the play is at 8:00. So they drive downtown and get there, only to discover it had actually been at 2:00. Only 6 hours late. No biggie. $150, down the drain. I laughed so hard when she told me this.

Keri: Ask me how the play was.
Me: How was the play?
Keri: OH WAIT, WE DIDN'T SEE IT BECAUSE WE WERE 6 HOURS LATE.
Me: Holy shit, what did mom say?
Keri: She started crying because she felt so bad for me, and then I was crying because I felt bad that I had crapped on her birthday present. The parking lot lady didn't even make us pay because she felt so bad for us.

You crazy bitch, look at the ticket next time. I hope Lemony Snicket (which they saw instead) was worth that $150 that you shelled out for it. Maybe you can see Jesus next weekend. Oh wait, no you can't; that was the last weekend that it was in Chicago. What a series of unfortunate events.

Emily is gone for the night, and for some reason when she's gone, it feels like when your parents go away for the night and leave the house to you. I can smoke in the front room! I can play music loud at night! I don't have to heard the C-word for 16 hours! Life is so wonderful sometimes.

I've been sitting here for 10 minutes trying to think of something else to write about, but I got nothing. I'll go comment now, because I know that's all you really care about. Oh, and download Oh What a World by Rufus Wainwright. It's probably too queer for most of you, but it's a magnificent song. That's the only word I can think of to describe it. As my mom would say, gobs of love bitches. Minus the "bitches" part.

6 comments:

Cowe said...

I'll leave you a comment so you don't feel bad, even though I have nothing to say. I think I'll leave it at that.

This comment contains approximately 30 carbohydrates.

... said...

I'd just like to say that even though your post was long and supposedly "boring", it entertained me. Score?

That's a great story about your heels. But having cold ass feet really does suck. When I was in Tahoe my feet were about to fall off cuz I was the lame out of town white boy wearing Chucks in 5 inches of snow. Good thing my parents shelled out $90 for some boots for me. The rest of the trip I was kicking random people with them. Really hard too...

And just for the record, no one will ever get between me and my truck.
.eric


Except maybe a dumb-ass drunk driver...Wait, I should erase that, it's not funny. In fact, it makes me feel kinda weird. Na, now I'm gonna leave it.

Peppermint Patty said...

when you turn 21, it's not as big a deal to go to the bar anymore. i think i've been a max of 5 times, including the 21st bday (i'm 8 months legal). i drink more at home now, and it's cool cause i can get drunk and pass out and wonder how i got home the night before because i never even left.

i love rufus! don't have that song yet, but i will soon. do you have 'cigarettes and chocolate milk'? it's my fave aside from (of course) 'hallelujah'.

Bill B. said...

Aww Kathryn, I have shed many a tear for Keri and your mummy. They could rent the video though.......I think Meatloaf was in it so that's an added bonus. $150 dollars is about the price it costs for the bond they shared that day though and I bet mummy has a new favorite kid! Sorry that's my sick humor right there. Joking I am! Anyhow you're lucky I'm commenting on this because of your lack of spirit so there you go.

Jenn said...

That really sucks about your mom's birthday present. Keri needs an alarm clock. Or a reminder option on her cell. Can't she get a damn refund?

Oh, and the walking in the snow with now shoes story was just as amusing the first time as it was the 2nd. You're a crazy bitch. But that's why I love you.

So Emily being gone is like when mom's gone. That's freakin' great. Go you. Make a mess 'n stuff! Get drunk and leave bottles everywhere and smoke in every room but hers. Then an hour before she gets there clean! I don't know what I'm talking about, I'm hella tired. So I'm done talking about nothing now.

stellah martiano said...

Naw Jenn, she needs to read things first. You'd never get a refund on something that has already been. Sad though, poor Mom.

Lucky about your tootsies. That little toe could still be in danger!