Friday, April 29, 2005

The Writing's On The Wall

Signs I go to bed too late: I overslept for class today. The class I had to hand the paper in. I'm awesome. I still handed that awful piece of shit in, but good lord I felt like a dumbass oversleeping for my 2:00 pm class. Then I forgot my purse so I didn't have my student ID to print out the paper with. Before I could even print it out, I had to sign on the computer in the lab and had to go on 5 different ones to find one that let me on. After handing in the paper I tried to sell back three books for some money and got back $9.50. Collectively. Not per book. Please stop raping me, University Bookstore. The first hour I was awake was not the greatest, but I'm done bitching, I swear.

Signs my friends are awesome: my brother, Jewel's-Number-One-Cashier, is a douche. He didn't get tickets for Tom Petty because he claims his friend can "hook us up with free ones." Apparently he has ties with mobsters. I hate not having tickets for concerts; my friend Diana always wants to go to concerts hoping to score a free ticket aka "miracle" outside before the show starts. I hate that shit. If I'm going, I want to have a ticket in my hand, reassuring me that I WILL get inside the venue and I WILL see the band. Anyways, Kelly the old roomie, called me today asking if I wanted to go to the concert, and that she would pay for my ticket for my birthday. And that's not counting "the drinks I'll buy you on your birthday." Fuck yeah Kelly, I love you.

Signs my birthday is coming up: I looked at the clock today when it was 5:12 pm. On Friends Ross had to guess a birthday and he said "May 12th." It's now offically 12 days until my birthday.

Signs I'm a douche bag: Today, not April 25th is Gabe's birthday. So now he gets two "happy birthdays". I'm sorry I messed up, please find it in your heart to forgive me. I hope you have a wonderful time at your precious Maxdon's tomorrow, although I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that. Have fun drinking your irish coffee, jack and cokes, beer and irish car bombs. I'm glad you're keeping your heritage alive, just please don't get alcohol poisoning in the process. Well it is your birthday, your half century birthday at that, so get that poisoning if you want. You've earned it. Plus it'll be a good story to tell the kids when they get older.

Signs I have too much time on my hands: I've talked to Jenn for way too long today. Not that I don't enjoy every minute of it lady, but christ, stop asking me questions like "is it peer or peek?" "ion or eon?" And stop offending people by leaving random comments everywhere. You know some people take these blogs seriously. Didn't your mom ever tell you to treat others as you want to be treated? Or to "stop being like peanut butter"? Or no wait, that's my mom. God bless you Pammy. Move to Chicago so we can drink together, goddamnit. New Mexico sucks, bitches.

5 comments:

doym said...

You do stay up too late, you posted on my blog at like 9pm my time which is like 4am there? But sleeping in past 2pm is an awesome effort, I could only get to 1pm when I was unemployed so I solute you.

I’m with you on your douche brother, if I want to go to a concert I want to know I’m going to see them, not crying at the gate cause someone’s not as cool as they thought and couldn’t get the hook up, “Just buy the tickets Bitch”, dump the douche bag brother and go with your mate.

Cowe said...

OK woman, you need to give me your address so that I can post this shit to you for (somewhere in the vicinity of) your birthday.

I've actually read all the legal shit about adopting kids from China. I was planning to go over and adopt a little girl. I bet nobody knew that about me except for the ex.

Jenn Doll said...

Jay, quit acting like a grandpa! I'm still not all "clubbed-out." Leave her alone, Mr!

Well, you going to bed late means us talking forever. Plus, the freaks come out at night. So don't change that soon. Speaking of which, I'm going on like 30+ hours right now. I should at least do drugs so I know why the fuck I'm up!

Tell your brother I'm not afraid to hit a bitch and congratulations! I wouldn't even bother going to a show "thinking" I might get a ticket. Nope, not happening. Don't be a douche, go WITH the ticket. He'll learn, he'll learn.

You posted this on the 28th, right? And you're birthday's on the 12th, right? That makes it 14 day's, you douche. Your dad really did fuck you all up with the math huh? I may not know when the fucking Gettysburgh Address was, but I sure as hell can count to 14! I do love you more at time like these!

Well, and TODAY is Gabe's birthday. You're all over it huh? Keep talking shit to me about not knowing birthday, asshole! Happy Birthday, Gabe!

I've now talked to you for two day's straight and I need a break. So it's a good thing we were both gonna stay in and get drunk together but you found a party and I'm just here. You read my mind, bitch! Have fun and move your head alot so the earrings dangle and make movement and attract attention. Dangly earring's, Katie? That's so 1980's. What were you thinking?

Unknown said...

Hey nice to meet you, I was thinking about taking a lucky lady over to Europe with me, but I don't think that we know each other enough yet, but I will marry you.
Andrew

Bill B. said...

The only problem with that though Hoagie is that most textbook publishers are updating their editions every year now meaning last years would be worthless. Our school is like that and there has been many protests and articles and everything done about it, but they don't give a shit. It's like I paid 120 bucks for a BRAND NEW up to date Psych book that just came out and the next semester I tried to sell it and it was already revised. Evil bastards all around.